Lesbian Poetry

Waiting...

Why do I always forgive you
For hurting me like this
Time after time, again & again
I push the anger and pain aside,
Saving it for another time.
I'm waiting for the morning
When I wake up hating you.

Would you forgive me
If I was truly honest with you?
Oh, you pretend to care,
But if you knew my real feelings,
You would know how it feels,
To be unloved,
Unloved and unsatisfactory.

Forgiveness is a funny thing.
It shows up in odd places
At unwanted moments.
It astounds me
When I manage to forgive you
Even though I want nothing more
Than to turn and walk away from you.

I don't understand it,
But I don't really want to.
I suppose it's out of my control
As far as my heart goes.
I guess in the end
It's about forgiving and forgetting
I just can't seem to forget.